Thursday, September 13, 2012

Life Happens

I've been asked a couple of times lately why I haven't been blogging. There's so much I could say about that, so many excuses I could give. The truth is that, as the title of this post says, life happens. Sometimes life happens in a way that you don't want to share, or that makes sharing complicated.

Since my mother's death I've spent a lot of time thinking and pondering my life; what it looked like then, what I wanted it to look like, and how divergent those two visions and experiences had become. When I first commenced to write 2-at-a-Time Socks my life was fairly uncomplicated. Kids were grown, things were stable and settled, and the chaos that comes with writing and launching what turned out to be a very popular book seemed manageable.

My mother had her first heart attack the weekend before I delivered the manuscript for 2-at-a-Time Socks to Gwen Steege at McCusker's Market in Shelburne. I went directly from the market to Springfield to bring her home from cardiac catheterization. It marked the beginning of a complicated time in my life. In brief, the second book was delivered to Gwen the day after a fierce ice storm on the day that my mother had a spinal fusion -  Gene drove me to North Adams to drop everything off, and we went directly from Storey to Mercy Hospital. By the time I started working on TYV Circular Knitting, I had lived through most of Lyme. All three boys married between October of 2010 and July of 2011. My mother's condition declined further, and as I shared here she died on November 13, 2011. Girl - the same Girl you met here in 2005 - is getting married in a matter of days. In between there's been moves (mine, my mothers - three times, Girl's - first off to college and then into an apartment of her own), changes, alterations, adaptations, stresses, joys, sorrows, and celebrations.

Life happens. Seven years have flown by. Much has been amazing, and I am so grateful for the blessings I've received. But much has been painful, and there is a lot I would choose to forget.

It is not uncommon for me to change the course of my life. I have been many things, and hope to be many more. Right now I am playing around with my life, trying to determine where I am headed next. Thank you for sharing in this part of the adventure. I am not sure if the blog will continue or not, but thought you should at least get a little insight into what's been going on here. What's going on is change, and even I am not sure what that means yet!

2 comments:

Bonnie said...

Thanks for the post. Whatever you decide, I hope that you love your life fully! Congrats on the upcoming wedding.

Cathy said...

Thank you for sharing. A quick prayer for you during this transition - and for Girl and her hubby-to-be. Enjoy the festivities!